Finding yourself is overrated

I'm going to get a little new agey on all of you here. Prepare yourself as you deem necessary.

I am a Virgo. Yup, the Eternal Virgin, which can basically mean we have a giant rod stuck up our asses from time to time. However... there is something else that softens this critical quality that we Virgos have. It's called being a mutable sign.

Per Wikipedia:

In astrology, the mutable signs (also called common signs or bicorporal or double-bodied signs) are a subgroup of the zodiac. They are Gemini, Virgo, Sagittarius and Pisces. The mutable signs straddle two temperate zone seasons, encompassing an inherent duality in its symbolism.

In the tropical zodiac, mutable signs coincide with the times of change in the seasons. They are associated with change and versatility. Individuals born under the four mutable quality signs are thought to be adaptable, impressionable, sharp, sympathetic, communicative, resourceful and restless, with a gift for seeing both sides of a situation at the same time and an immense desire for knowledge, variety and new ideas. They supposedly adapt very well to new situations, possess much flexibility, seldom have any particular agenda and are perfectly happy to fill in an assigned role. However, they are also said to be inconsistent, changeable, nervous, indecisive and irresponsible, with a tendency to get wrapped up in tiny particulars. There is also a certain duality associated with all the mutable quality signs.


So what does all the gobbledygook mean? It means that we Virgos tend to take on traits of those around us. In a sense, parts of our own personalities are muted and are replaced with our friends, family members, coworkers etc.

You know those girls in high school that would change what music they listened to or the way they dressed based on the guy they were dating...?? Yeah. It's like that.

Sounds kind of horrible right? Never really being yourself and always being a chameleon to the people around you? Sure it has its moments and I must say that I spent a lot of time trying to figure out who I really was. I spent years hating that I didn't know if I really liked something, or if it was because a friend liked it, or a boyfriend. I constantly questioned myself. The conclusion? This behavior is part of who I am. I definitely have my own tastes, even if it takes me awhile to figure it out. And really, what is so wrong with enjoying something for a time because someone around you enjoys it or because you want to find common ground with someone? Also, I've found that it doesn't apply to those who are closest to me. I don't take on traits of my best friends or my family members. I think I understand them well enough that the curiosity gene in me doesn't activate itself.

There are a lot of pluses to being mutable. We get along with a wide variety of people. We can be quite empathetic. We experience, and truly enjoy varied hobbies, tastes, subject matters etc.

It is particular useful for writing. Writers, fiction writers in particular, have to really get inside someone's head. It's a natural occurrence for those of us who are mutable signs. We spend the vast majority of our lives being parts of other people in order to understand them and relate.

So as a writer I saw that finding yourself is overrated. Finding and understanding other people on the other hand is wildly fascinating and helpful.

Mute Karaoke. Who needs standardized sign language anyway?